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Hi [ Tue, 10/2/07 - 12:31 am]
[ mood | sleepy ]

Hi guys, I know its been awhile since I've updated.. Been shit happenin left and right.. My sister brought home a friend she liked.. he turned out to be 18.. she is 15.. He is such a flirt and she is too but she is so rough and mean.. He is pretty cool though.. Its good for us to have a friend outside the computer.. He is just too good at flipping you with his eyes.. Rick is doing good.. I love him so much.. OMG!


"Its good to hear your voice, sayin my name, it sounds so sweet comin from the lips of an angel"

sorry, relapsed.. we've heard it like 50 times saturday coz of Superman (Kelli's friend) was worth it though, i like this song..

ok well



been awhile [ Sun, 10/29/06 - 1:17 am]
[ mood | chipper ]

Hey all.. I know its been awhile but things have been hectic.. Rick had his shoulder surgery the 20th.. he is doing wonderful.. I'm sitting here watching rocky horror on VH1.. Was going to go to bed.. but things change.. Nothing really interesting except i rearranged half my room.. i guess that about sums it up..

I've decided to look into Druidism.. Something about it just draws me in for some reason.. I think that is going to end up being my chosen path..

Uhh.. yeah... Thats all for now.

 1 feyfairies giggle 

BB! [ Tue, 8/1/06 - 11:25 am]
[ mood | worried ]

Well, I'm sitting here with Big Brother's live feeds playing in my ears and worrying to death about Rick.. He's at his appointment with the surgeon and I'm stuck here, worrying about whats going on.. The suspense is killing me.. -sighs-

On a funny note: I can hear one of the rats' radios through the wall. they are listening to XM ESPN radio.. this isn't good, it means the Hamsters can hear it and the rat's whose radio it is, is gunna be in t-r-o-u-b-l-e.



Well.. [ Wed, 7/26/06 - 4:36 pm]
[ mood | depressed ]

Today Mom took us to the store.. On the way there she had her MP3 player on the radio station and she suddenly shoves an earbud into my ear to hear Bob Seger's new song "Wait for me". Well, let me tell you.. I walked into Kroger looking like a red-eyed fool.. I cried through the whole song.. He wrote it for his kids. Bob Seger wrote alot of trucking songs.. My dad used to be a trucker.. And now that he isn't with us anymore, alot of songs affect me. But this one... This one hit me like a ton of bricks.. It was like it was written by Daddy's hand and straight out of this beautiful man's voice. It was amazing.. I'm going to post the lyrics now..

-Wait for Me - Bob Seger-

I will answer the wind
I will leave with the tide
I’ll be out on the road
Every chance I can ride

Not matter how far
No matter how free
I’ll be alone
If you’ll wait for me

There’ll be times when I’ll rise
There’ll be times when I’ll fall
There’ll be times when its best say nothing at all

Knowing you’re right
Letting it be
I’ll be around
If you’ll wait for me
If you’ll wait for me

And I’ll fight for the right to go over the hill
If it’ll only mean something to me
I will not be persuaded
I wont be still
I’ll find a way to be free

In the cool of the night
In the heat of the day
If you’re ever in doubt
I’ll be on my way
Straight to your side
I guarantee
I’ll be around
If you’ll wait for me
If you’ll wait for me*

I'll swear it came straight from my daddy's hand. It was like.. The only way I can put it is a message from beyond.. I've been really missing him lately what with father's day passing and all. And I haven't been able to shake the depression of not having him around.. And then the dreams of him.. I actually dreamed of him today.. but thats all i can remember. it wasn't a good dream at all.. But earlier in the week I did have good dreams, and he was very reassuring..

I want to thank Bob Seger for hitting the nail on the head and helping me through this.. yes, my daddy died several years ago.. 7, i do believe.. but the wound of losing him is still there like a bad habit.. and I don't think I'll ever get rid of it. But I've got my wonderful husband here, who helps me through everything.. He is so good to me. I love you, Duckie.

 1 feyfairies giggle 

Lazy ramadi! [ Tue, 6/20/06 - 1:09 am]
[ mood | chipper ]

These two are from Muncie, Indiana.. I am so damned proud to be a hoosier.. they are so fuckin cool..


Lazy Ramadi FTW!

birthdays! hospitals! the past! OH MY! [ Wed, 6/7/06 - 11:37 am]
[ mood | stressed ]

Well, Yesterday was Rick's birthday. The big 2-4. My little devil.. Too bad it was spent in the hospital. I was jerked awake to my sister screaming that Mindy was on the front porch. Mindy being my 'sperm donor's' Girlfriend.. I ran outside to be told to get in the car coz we're going to the hospital.. My sperm donor was having a pacemaker put in. So, at 11am off we went to the hospital.. We were informed of the risks, blahblahblah. They took him in to do the surgery.. So, me and Rick and Mindy walked over the Riley hospital coz there is a mcdonalds in there and none of us had eaten a thing. On the way over, sitting right there on the wall, the past hit me like a mack truck.. Jodi Lynn.. Yes, Jodi.. My cousin, who i used to be so close to as a kid. Was sitting right there with her 2ish year old, Hannah and her bf or husband Ronny. Of all people, I run into Jodi. I walked past her at first.. Stopped and turned around and started shaking instantly. She told me she'd recently had another little girl, Hallie. She was 2 months early but went home not too long ago and they had to take her back in.. She asked about Kelli and all that.. Then she told me that her brother, David lee, was looking for Kelli and Mom and gave me the number.. Unfortunately, I lost the number and now mom has to go find David Lee. She looks just like her momma.. Hannah on the other hand.. I don't know where she got her genes.. BIIIIIIIIIIIG blue eyes and the blondest hair.. Jodi's is a dark dark brown and Ronny's is black.. So where she got blonde I'll never know.. Anyway.

We headed on into mcdonalds, got our food, thank you Mindy for paying for mine.. And we sat down.. We're sitting there eating and discussing Rick.. Apparently he has been lying to me and her to keep us apart.. Telling her I do nothing but bitch.. And telling me he can't come see me back he has to do this or that for Mindy.. Well, we continued talking and apparently he told her 2 weeks ago he was coming with Norman, her brother, to come see me.. They never showed.. I haven't seen him in 3 months until yesterday.. He also told her he didn't know how mom or Bill was and didn't know where they lived.. Which is a lie, he came to their new house on Thanksgiving. And apparently has been telling Mindy he has talked to me on a regular basis, blahblahblah.. Well, she was furious when she found out and started going through his wallet.. Out drops a titty bar card with the name Diamond and a phone number HAND written on the back..

Well, we confronted him when he got to his room.. He outright called me a liar.. He was more worried about his relationship with Mindy than with the one with his own blood.. Mindy was irate at this point. She went off on him then walked out.. I calmly and quietly went off on him.. I told him I couldn't handle this anymore, I was sick of the stupid games and I refused to participate anymore. I told him I wouldn't be calling him, going to see him or anything. The ball was in his court.. I told him at least I loved him enough to come up the hospital with him when he didn't even call to see if I was living.. I promptly told him I was glad he made it through the surgery and that I hoped he recovered well/fast. I then told him that I loved him more than he'd ever know and to go to hell and walked out..

Every nerve in my body was on the surface of my skin.. If anyone would have touched me.. I would have crumpled to the floor and had a nervous breakdown. I sat down in front of the elevators and cried and cried and cried... Mindy was so irate she said that he would be exiting their home friday or saturday. That she was sick of him making her to be the bad guy and all the lies.. That she couldn't, and wouldn't, handle it anymore.. Rick was so supportive.. He was there for me the whole entire time, even though it was his birthday.. He held me when I cried.. He backed off when I was shaking/crying/ready to collapse if anyone touched me. He held his tongue when Asshole looked at me and flat out called me a liar.. Everything.. I couldn't ask for a better person to call my soulmate.. It was his birthday, but he sacraficed it for me.. I can't thank him enough for everything he has done for me. Baby, I love you so much, thank you..

So.. Birthdays.. Hospital.. And my past, my cousin.. All in ONE day..ONE!.. I can't believe any of it happened.. And I partially wish it hadn't've...yeah...


 7 feyfairies giggle 

NO MORE SLEEPING ON THE..... [ Mon, 5/15/06 - 8:40 pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]

Well, maybe, just maybe.. We won't be sleeping on just a mattress anymore.. It seems, through the wonders of freecycle, which rocks.. We have found a box spring.. Quite possibly a box spring and two mattresses -grins- So no more sleeping on the FLOOR!!.. Which will be good if he has this surgery, he won't have to struggle up from the floor to standing with one arm.

We have been RPing like mad people for about a week and a half now.. Now we're working on our SWKr's RPs.. We're so creative together that we don't even bother with other people.. We RP together in our houses for hours and hours.. I think our record so far is like.. 6 hours.. lol..

OH, btw, Welcome to my LJ, Ian dear.. It isn't much but I do tend to babble on it alot..

Clandestine... wooo boy.. All hell broke loose today.. I don't know what happened but 3 people were being bounced in and out of jail.. someone kept overturning 2 of their jailtimes and then the same someone would jail the 3rd person.. it was crazy.. we almost lost a couple imms/imps that I know of.. then all the sudden.. BOOM one imm that reinc'd had her timer going was back as an imm and the ANC owner popped on, posted a note, and stuck around for any lip.. Once things stabled out, he left.. but man.. shit hit the fan something hard.. notes flying, insults flying..jeesh..

I kinda went off on reltalk about it.. went on for about 15 minutes then shut up when I certain nosey ass signed on to see what was going on.. Poor IMMs.. they've been doing everything they can to hold things together in Sassy's absence, and the more they try to balance out things like pk and RP, areas and exp, armor and sp/rt. the more they get shit on.. People are ungreatful little fucks.. I swear to goddess.. More to come, i'm sure..


 6 feyfairies giggle 

drama is an understatement.. [ Tue, 5/2/06 - 2:41 am]
[ mood | pissed off ]

Someone explain to me WHY people need to make drama when drama is not needed?! He has NO right to tell this person they are going to be demoted to DF.. They are a fucking CH, NOT CR.. My head hurts, its storming, the lightning was wild as hell. I was laying in bed listening to the storm roll in and told myself if the lightning wasn't too bad, I'd just go to sleep, fuck the radar.. HAHAHHAHAHAHA.. Lightning showed me what for.. it blasted everything white and the sky stayed lit up this neon blue for about 30 seconds.. Guess what I did?....That is why I'm here.. haha.. I'm going to set the damned person straight on telling people they will be demoted.. that shit isn't gunna fly.. He has EARNED that position.. unlike another GN I could readily name.. Fuck it, i'm tired..

One pissed off..


 5 feyfairies giggle 

Hellraiser!!! [ Tue, 4/25/06 - 8:55 pm]
[ mood | chipper ]

Well, I finally get to see the hellraisers again.. sadly I found them in the middle of the 4th hellraiser. so Inferno is next.. I still can't track down what they were before they became cenobites.. I know pinhead was a carpenter.. the twin cenobites were twins, i believe.. I wish i knew which movie it explained all that in. Billy has one of those boxes.. its just a little storage type thinger but I still refuse to fuck with it. Those movies spooked me that much. I got sunburnt real bad from sitting in the sun with Rick two days in a row reading.. my left shoulder and back are now burnt.. so it matches my right shoulder from riding in the car the other day.. Rick pointed it out yesterday evening, it wasn't hurting before then.. he pointed it out, and just like with my right shoulder, it started hurting.. and my goddess, it didn't stop until i put some of aloe burn stuff on it. Clandestine is bugging me.. People are fucking morons. We ran trivia the other night..fine..dandy.. well, two, count them, TWO people decided to be fucking jerks and hunt down the sites we were using and POST THEM ON THE TRIVIA CHANNEL.. needless to say, I was pissed.. Rick spent hours, literally a good 4 hours, searching out those sites.. using google and going 7-8 pages into the search to get to them so no one would be able to find them easily.. Fuck if they didn't.. somehow got right to it lickety split.. I got a new livejournal, well, this one will still be used for normal posts.. But Dreamy_destiny will now be used for my dream journal.. its easier for me to type them out then write them out.. I can remember better when i can type as i think rather then having to wait and write out words.. OMFG , they stuck their hands in his chest!! Sorry, watching hellraiser while I type.. he shouldn't have fucked with the box after seeing the guy skinned.. I joined a dream interpretation site..Semiconcious.. They seem pretty good at it there were several responses to other peoples posts that seemed to jive with the dream..

Rick's shoulder came out again tonight.. it kinda rolled forward then dropped out of socket. i HEARD it.. omg.. that scared me so bad.. he is going to the hosp tomorrow, getting back on WA, and going to either get his MRI moved up, or get some painkillers.. his arm was throbbing, i could feel it.. Well, If I think of anymore, i'll post again. :D



Homemade cherry coke FTW [ Tue, 4/18/06 - 1:55 pm]
[ mood | bouncy ]

Well, speedway = god at this point.. their fountain drinks machine has this syrup thingie on it.. cherry, vanilla or lime.. take a shot of the cherry then fill it with coke.. omg, its better then cherry coke from the store.. Well, we finally got the QM flag on cland and omg is it sweet.. I love it.. I ran freeze tag last night and when i reset it, a couple people who had a red flag lost it.. MUAHAHAHAHA..

I've been having fucked up dreams for the past couple nights.. I'm sick of them to be honest.. Uh, Oh, my state id.. I was supposed to get it yesterday but didn't have a secondary document so I have to wait 2-3 weeks for a transcript from my school, then i can get it, go figure.. Ok, i'm using a LJ updater thing, I don't know if I like it yet, so we'll see. Hrm.. Rick is stuck on GTA: SA again.. killing maiming, forgetting how to drive.. the normal.. We now own all the houses but one on the first area we can be in.. He can't quite get the hang of the driving thing.. and he is stuck in the bad guys territory.. lmao... We just listened to the soundtrack for PoTo that i downloaded.. Music of the night was a recording from, i think, a show in england. it was awesome.. its on Phantom_rick 's userinfo.. I love it..

Ok, i'm done for now.



Raisins, Skittles, M&m's.. OH MY! [ Thu, 4/13/06 - 4:12 am]
[ mood | energetic ]

Well, Clandestine has been down for like...ever, now.. I'm getting bored with neopets.. One can only do so much on neopets, man... I've changed my shop, gallery, userinfo lookup, blahblah etc.etc.. I've played Kacheek seek so much my neopet is bitching at me. Oohhh, buddy, I made this...goulash'y, hash'y type thing.. smashed potatos with hamburger mixed into it.. We've got like a whole big ass serving bowl left of it and I only used 4 potatoes.. Granted, they were mutant potatoes the size of texas... ok, new subject...

THIS IDIOT I KNEW... no SHIT.. he took this poll type thing and one of the questions were about watching porn he answered "no" or some shit.. Yeah, right, hence why you HAVE A MEMBERSHIP TO A FUCKING PORN SITE, RIGHT?!.. he doesn't jerk off... again...MEMBERSHIP... Some people amaze me on how they lie... I swear to the gods...

Well with cland down, neopets exhausted, I resorted to playing a mud Rick was testing.. Aardwolf.. It isn't a bad mud.. I kinda like it.. I have all the speedwalks saved in my paths and i just ZOOM around questing.. course, there is 30 minutes between quests, which is a little boring with nothing to do in between them.. We've got another MUD to transfer our DL to.. but its going to take alot of time and concentration.. And with cland being down... I have neither.. lol

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOmg, its going to be in the 70's alllllllllllllllllllll week.. clear into as far as the forecast goes... monday.. WHEE! I can't wait for the mild weather, it keeps this room so comfortable with the A/C on. Ok, now I think I'm babbling on.. So i'm going to wrap this bitch up! :D


 3 feyfairies giggle 

DRAMA DRAMA FUCKIN DRAMA [ Wed, 4/5/06 - 8:10 pm]
[ mood | calm ]

I'm so sick of the petty childish drama on this fucking MUD, dude.. I've listened to it for days now, its fucking pathetic.. The IMP leaves and everything goes to shit.. Don't get me wrong, DS and Carita are trying their damnest.. fuck this ranting... next..


Dreams. Now. Rick went to the library for me and got me the most helpful book ever.. "In your dreams: The ultimate dream dictionary" bye Mary Summer Rain.. The reason I'm so happy he picked it up is I've been having the SAME dream for about a weekish now...

"We're living here, its the present time, all is the same,
it's like a real life dream.. In the dream I was sick every
morning and night. I was getting anxious so I bought a PG test.
Found out I was 2 months pregnant by going to the doc when the
test was positive. Then the dream did a time jump. I was going to
have a baby boy.. Named Steven Wayne, after my daddy. another jump
and I'm in labor.. Another jump and we're home and I'm taking care
of this little baby.. then I wake up."

Now, I've been searching websites for meanings and then this book shows up in Rick's hands.. Here is what the theme means...

"Pregancy Test refers to a question as to whether or not
this is a good time to start a new venture or beginning."

"Pregancy signifies an embryonis stage of a specific type
of awareness or enlightenment. May point to the beginning
formulation of a plan or idea."

Now, thats all find and dandy except for one thing.. I'm doing neither and none.. So, I'm wondering.. Is it my subconcious trying to tell me the enevitable is coming? I don't know, but I sure hope so.. I'm aching for a child.. believe it or not....ugh, enough.. I'm done for now..

 4 feyfairies giggle 

The internet [ Mon, 4/3/06 - 6:55 am]
[ mood | awake ]

Well, its 7am, I'm up.. And sitting here going through websites with phantom of the opera wallpapers/banners.. All I can say is WOW. some people are gifted.. I've found some beautiful wallpapers.. Some that would be perfect for livejournal backgrounds.. So, I've officially started a PotO LJBJ folder.. I think my LJ is going to be changing quite often now that I know how to do it.. Rick's too.. I've found some awesome ones for him.. I can't sleep, then again, when can I.. I have sub on the brain.. I'm not talking sub made by some greasy teenager.. I'm talking fresh sweet italian bread, roast beef, smoked turkey, sliced block marbled cheddar with crisp lettuce and a thin layer of miracle whip.. o...m...g...I am STARVING...Well, I'm going to go smoke one more cigarette and maybe tinker around on Clandestine for a bit..



changing of zee mind [ Mon, 4/3/06 - 12:55 am]
[ mood | naughty ]

So, I've changed my mind and decided this is my new livejournal.. I'm sitting here watching a special most haunted on the cruise ship turned hotel/resturaunt/museum The Queen Mary.. Holy shiznittle, dude.. They were hearing, seeing, catching things and their sound man SEEN a woman sitting on the slide to the EMPTY pool.. They left and all the crew was accounted for in the tech room.. they decided to do one more visit to the pool/changing rooms and all the sudden there was water, like it dripped off of someone and to prove the point of it not being dripping water from the ceiling.. THERE WERE FOOTPRINTS.. i'm not talking manly prints.. I'm talking petite, dried with the salt, footprints.. the queen mary was known for using water from the sea to fill the pool multiple times to keep the water fresh.. I'm officially creeped out, man.. lmao.. Now, Clandestine.. drama drama drama! we had some wild ass storms blow through.. they all converged above ME and grew stronger.. there were funnel clouds and touchdowns EVERYWHERE.. it was scary, my mom had to take my steddad to work and her and my sister got locked down in Walmart.. ordered to the center of the store, so she rode the hell out in walmart on the phone with me listening to the news... man.. one helluva night..



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